A Piper Among Players
by persianprincess11
Summary: My readers have spoken: When the Piper has a fight with Capricorn, he storms off to join a Strolling Player commune, but life with them isn't as great as he thought! You don't need to have read Sun and Moon to understand it since it's kind of a prequel...
1. Chapter 1

"UP! GET UP!" the Piper's fair hair was suddenly yanked halfway out of his skull as the Magpie made her morning rounds. The maid he'd slept with the previous night gasped and dove under the covers. "I saw you, you little slut. " Mortola snapped. "And you!' she pointed a bony finger at the Piper. "Stop locking your door when you know you have to get up on time in the morning! It took me almost ten minutes to pick the lock!" she turned and stormed out to torment other unfortunate souls.

The Piper ran his hand through his platinum blonde hair when the maid poked her head up next to him. "I could wake you up a little more if you want." She licked her lips suggestively.

"Get out of my room, Sara." He grumbled as he reached for a robe near the bed. She humbly obliged, leaving him alone.

Ugh. He'd forgotten there was an execution today. He'd have to sing about how great Capricorn was and act grateful for the two silver coins he got for it. Sometimes being a minstrel among robbers and arsonists was so depressing. They didn't know what music was.

Outside in the courtyard all the fire-raisers were gathering like sharks that had scented blood. The accused, a scruffy looking fire-eater, was sitting miserably in a cage in the center, and Capricorn was already hamming it up on his paltry excuse for a throne.

"Piper! Play us a tune, will you?" Capricorn shouted jovially.

"Yes, sir." He said through his teeth. He struck up a song about how this particular enemy of Capricorn should have thought twice before crossing him. When he got to the part where a name had to be mentioned, he paused and asked, "What's this bloke's name?"

"Dustfinger." Replied Capricorn. The Piper nodded and continued. "Stop!" Capricorn demanded. The minstrel's fingers struck a discordant note and he turned to face his master.

"Yes?" he said with curt respect.

"That's the song you played last week, but the name is changed!" he accused.

"Yes." The Piper said.

"You can't do that! You need a new song every week!"

"I wasn't aware." The dryness was evident in his voice, and Capricorn heard it.

"Well, in case you weren't aware, I'm the one who pays for all your fine clothes, and the fancy shampoo for that soft, beautiful hair of yours, so I expect some real music from you!"

"You know nothing about music!" the Piper hissed.

"It's that stuff I pay you way too much for, right?" Capricorn asked, a smile twisting his mouth. The Piper heard Basta giggling nearby.

"Money isn't all that matters." The minstrel, face draining of color in his anger, said defiantly. "I don't need your money, and I don't need you!"

"You forget your place, Piper. If you don't need me, then go."

"Maybe I will."

"Hold it!" Firefox had stepped between the two men, who were now toe-to-toe. "Neither of you means what you're saying."

"I mean what I'm saying." They said in unison.

"Stop interfering, Firefox. Capricorn can fight his own battles." Basta cut in. He stood facing Firefox challengingly, knife tucked behind his ear amid curly black hair and a smirk growing on his face.

"Shut up, Basta!" he dismissed the knife-thrower and turned back to the Piper and Capricorn.

"Don't tell Basta to shut up!" Capricorn exclaimed.

"Yeah, don't tell me to shut up!" Basta sneered.

"Fuck you, Basta!" the Piper shouted. He abruptly picked up his lyre and stormed up to his room.

"Where do you think you're going?" Capricorn called after him.

"I'm going somewhere I'll be appreciated!" he shot back. Firefox hurried after him up the tower.

"What do you think you're proving here?" he demanded. The Piper was stuffing expensive clothes and jewelry into a bag.

"I'm tired of being held back by those cultureless idiots! I'm going to live with my kind!" he pointed out the window at a distant cloud of smoke. "The Strolling Players! They will shelter me as one of their own, and together we will build a new era of music and light!"

"You really need to take your fights with Capricorn less seriously." Firefox leaned on the door frame in exasperation.

"Look, I'm an artistic genius." The Piper paused his packing to accompany his speech with a bunch of pretentious-looking hand gestures. "A genius needs to be nurtured in a community of other, slightly less ingenius geniuses. Capricorn is stifling my genius, when it needs to be set free!" he put his hands one on top of another and flutter the fingers like wings.

"What…what was that?"

"It was a bird." Sniffed the Piper. "Flying away into a sunrise of freedom."

"My, aren't we metaphorical today." He replied dryly.

"Shut up." The Piper laughed. "Anyway, I'll write to you from the commune."

"I can't read." Firefox reminded him.

"Oh. I'll think of you." He walked past Firefox and started down the stairs.

"Fine. I'll let you sow your wild oats. Have fun. But can I have your room while you're gone?"

"NO!"

"But you don't think you're coming back!"

"Even so!"

Capricorn made no move to stop him from leaving, but a maid ran out of the crowd to stop him. "Piper!" she cried. "Please don't go, please don't leave me here! I love you!" she turned him around and put her hands on either side of his face. "I know it'll be hard to make this work, but I know we can! We're perfect for each other, you and I. What do you say to settling down on a farm, and getting married like you talked about?"

The Piper looked down in thought. "I—" he paused. She leaned in hopefully. "I have no idea who you are. Sorry." He began to walk away and turned back. "I'm really sorry. Obviously I was pretty drunk or something when you met me. I mean, I shudder to think—I hate farms, and I never want to get married. I mean—I just—don't—know you." The maid remained speechless and horror-stricken. "Sorry." He quickly walked down the road away from the awkward scene. Firefox waited until he had crested the hill to collapse laughing.

Walking past the maid, Basta commented, "If it cheers you up, this isn't the first time this has happened."


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Skycloud always rose the earliest of the Strolling Players, always up before noon. Through the haze that normally surrounded the Strolling Player camp, he suddenly saw, or hallucinated, he wasn't sure which, a traveller coming up the hill.

"Whoa, man!" he exclaimed. "Purplegrass! Hey!" he shook the ball of crust loosely covered by tie-dye clothing that was resting next to him. It looked up through blood-shot eyes. "Do you see that?" the ball of crust slowly turned, blinking its eyes owlishly as its pupils contracted in the early afternoon sun. Slowly it nodded. "Whoa. Crazy man." Purplegrass slowly lit its first joint of the day.

***

"Brothers! Sisters! I have come to join you!" cried the Piper, nervously side-stepping a monstrous bear that guarded the entrance to the camp. He coughed, his last breath of fresh air having been used up. His watering eyes blinked, and he was surprised when the legions of free spirits did not rise as one in a wave of song to embrace him as he had expected. A few looked up, but mostly they just stayed where they were and smoked, the fumes mingling with the steamy filth that rose from their bodies to form the shell of air around the compound.

"Like, welcome, brother, man..." he turned and saw a man wearing ragged clothing hopping over the intoxicated players with an agility he himself hadn't known he had. Following him was what the Piper assumed was some kind of large, furry dog someone had dressed up in people clothes.

"Who are you?" he asked.

The man spread his arms wide. "I am Skycloud Thistlerain, and I am the unofficial ruler of this commune! And this is Purplegrass." he gestured to the crust ball.

"Er, hello, Purplegrass." the Piper uncertainly held his hand out to Purplegrass. Purplegrass grunted and shuffled away.

"It doesn't shake hands. Doesn't talk much, either."

So it's a person? Thought the Piper. "It?" he asked Skycloud.

"We've never been sure what it is, so we just call it it." he replied. "So what's your name, stranger?"

"I am the Piper. I used to be Capricorn the fire-raiser's minstrel, but we had creative differences. I play the lyre and have written some beautiful songs, and I wish to be one of you." the Piper said, formal as if he was at a job interview.

"....You're the Piper?" asked Skycloud.

"Yes." the Piper said.

"But...you play a lyre."

"Yes."

"The Piper indicates that you play a pipe, or some other type of instrument in the woodwind family. This would include any instrument played by blowing through reeds or wood, producing a tone of higher, more delicate pitch than that of the related brass family." Skycloud paused. "Man."

"Don't make sense, dude." added a player lying on the ground nearby.

"It...it doesn't make sense." agreed the Piper. "Is that glass thing with water boiling in it a woodwind instrument of some kind?" he pointed to what the player was cradling in his arms like a baby.

Skycloud and the player looked at each other. "Yes." they both said.

"And we'll teach you to play it, too!" Skycloud said.

"Everyone here can." the other player said matter-of-factly.

"That's great!" the Piper said excitedly.

"But first, you need a new name, man!" Skycloud thought a minute. "You know, man, first let's play that 'woodwind instrument' for a while; it'll help us think."

"Music will clear our minds and free our souls!" the Piper said enthusiastically.

"Sure." Skycloud sat down and took a drag out of the bong. The other player did the same. "Your turn, man. Just breathe in." he giggled and said, "You know, I could really go for some cheese right now. Cheese is like the color four!"

"Oh, dude, you're tripping! Did someone mix stuff into that shit?" the player asked. After a moment, he decided it didn't matter, and gave the bong to the Piper. The Piper looked at it uncertainly, then took a gentle puff.

"Dude..." he whispered. He sat down with the other players to spend the afternoon 'chasing the green fairy,' as they told him it was called.

***

Capricorn had been holding auditions for a new minstrel all day. Basta and Firefox sat beside him as player after player came up to sing.

"This is a song I wrote about a boy I knew in my hometown." the blonde girl auditioning said in the accent characteristic of southern Lombrica. "See, I like to write my songs about stuff that happens to me in real life. It makes it more real."

"Get on with it!" Capricorn ordered.

The girl obeyed. She sang in an off key Lombrican drawl, "He's the reason for the teardrops on my lyre, the only one who keeps me wanting to set things on fire." When she was done, each of the judges critiqued her.

"I really liked that. That song made me not want to slice your face open." Basta grinned at her. "Drop by my room sometime."

"No." she shook her head.

"Oh. Then you suck."

Firefox was next. "Yo, dawg, that was trippin--I mean, it was okay."

Capricorn put on his most snobby upper-class Argentian accent and drawled, "Totally pathetic. I don't mean to be rude, but your singing is some of the worst I've heard in years."

"But...being a minstrel is my dream." the girl said with a sincere, small-town hurt puppy look.

"I don't care. Next!"

The next girl was a brunette. "You may have heard of my father, Battista-Ray Cyrus. He's the only reason people think I have talent."

"Okay..." Capricorn said. "You may begin."

"So I light a torch up, they're playing my song, the townspeople run away, burnin' the town like yeah, killin' them all like yeah--"

"STOP!" All three shouted. She ran from the room, nearly being hit by Basta's hastily thrown knife.

The next was a creepy woman wearing a dress made entirely of bubbles. As she sang, dancers came in to back her up. She sang, "I'm your arsonist, I'll burn you down until you love me, fire, fire-raiser. Baby there's no other criminal, you know that I'll be, your fire, fire-raiser."

When she had finished all three men just sat and stared.

"You--" Capricorn stuttered.

"That was so--" Firefox began.

"Bizarre." finished Basta. Slowly Firefox began clapping, and then the other two did the same. The minstrel woman bowed and exited.

The next woman who came in had long black hair and a face that looked like it was severely disfigured.

"What will you be singing, ma'am?" asked Capricorn.

"Nooooo, that's ignorant! I'm not a woman, I just have a skin condition!" he said in a super-high voice.

"Ooooookay?"

"This is Burn It!" he started screeching unintelligibly. "SHAMONE! OH!"

"Wonderful, wonderful!" Capricorn clapped enthusiastically as he finished his song. "How would you like to be paid?"

"I don't want money, I just want to molest young boys. HEE! OOH!" he randomly sang a few high notes.

"We have lots of those here! You're hired!" Capricorn gleefully shook the mysterious man's hand. "We'll call you the Thriller, because you thrill me!" Basta and Firefox looked at each other nervously.

***

"Hey, man, what if all of life is just, like, a book that people are reading?" the Piper's eyes were now as red as the other players'.

"Dude, you're tripping." said a player chick who was smoking next to him.

"Wanna do it?" he asked.

"Sure." she climbed on top of him. "Wait!" she said. "Take this first."

"What is it?"

"Ecstasy."

"No, seriously, what is it?"

"Just take some, man." she put the tablet on her tongue and kissed him, shoving it down his throat in the process. He gagged but it was already down.

"Whoa, man." his pupils dilated even wider. Suddenly he jumped up. "I feel like dancing! Come on!" They ran into the part of the camp that was in the shadow of the forest. There fairy lights flashing different colors were the only light. They danced hyperactively to the throbbing beat of the minstrels playing. For four days straight.

***

"Hey, man, when do we get to, like, play some music, man?" the Piper asked Skycloud once he had mellowed out.

"We don't really play music, we just, like, do drugs, man." said Skycloud.

"Don't you have any songs you could sing?"

"Well, I do have one song...I wrote it while I was on this." he tossed the Piper a vial of liquid, which he drank without question. "I am the eggman, they are the eggmen, I am the walrus! Koo koo ka choo!" he sang.

"Whoa, man." said the Piper. "That'll be my new name. The Walrus."

"But the Walrus doesn't make sense either. A walrus, or Odobenus Rosmarus, is a large, flippered marine mammal characterized by prominent tusks, whiskers, and great bulk, which can reach 4,500 pounds. Its diet consists mainly of bivalve mollusks and it is greatly valued for its tusks, blubber, meat, and hide. You're just a dude, dude. Man."

"It's, like, a metaphor, man." the Piper explained.

"Oh. Dude, that's totally rad."


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Firefox had never seen anyone like the Thriller. He didn't seem to eat anything or talk to anyone; he just walked in a strange sliding manner, backwards, all over the fortress, singing random high notes and calling everyone ignorant. He was watching him dance for a few of the youngest boys among the fire raisers when Basta approached him.

"Firefox." he said warily, aware of their mutual dislike.

"Basta." Firefox replied.

"Look, I'm no fan of the Piper, but I'm no fool. That creep can't keep hanging around here. Damn well kill our recruitment."

"I thought you just did whatever Capricorn did."

"Capricorn's a bit off his rocker right now. I'll go back to doing whatever he does once he gets rid of that freak."

"Well, I guess that means we'll have to overcome our differences."

"Right. What are our differences again?

Firefox blinked. "What do you mean? We're rivals, of course we have differences."

"We both like to burn things down, we both like to kill people. We both serve Capricorn, even though I do it a bit more fanatically, my weapon of choice is a knife rather than a sword like yours, and you have red hair whereas I have sumptuous black curls. But that's basically it."

"Huh. I guess, like most fire raisers, our characters are essentially the same."

"Cool. Let's go save the Piper from that strolling player commune."

"Where are you guys going?" the Thriller stopped them at the gate. Basta's skin always crawled whenever he saw the man's (?) face.

"Just out for a ride." he quickly replied.

"Ooh! I love rides! I'm gonna ride a horsie! SHAMONE!" he screeched. Firefox and Basta exchanged glances, but the Thriller was already getting on his horse and they had no choice but to go riding with him.

***

The Piper, or as he was now called, the Walrus, woke up with his stomach clawing at him for food. He shook Skycloud awake hurriedly.

"Hey, man, is there any food around?" he asked.

"You mean some pot-laced oat cakes?" Skycloud suggested.

"No, I want something that won't make me high." the strolling player looked at him like he was crazy, then went back to sleep. The Piper, confused, got up to look for some food.

To his dismay, he couldn't find any. None of the strolling players had jobs, so none of them had money. What little food they did have was half-drugs and was eaten immediately.

"What's going on?" asked the hippy chick who had given him the ecstasy.

"Hey, Morningwood. I can't find any food, and I'm really hungry." he replied.

"I got some some stuff that'll make you stop being hungry." she handed him a bag of powder. "Snort it up your nose."

"What?!"

"Snort it up your nose." the Piper hesitated, but did as he was told.

"WOW, MAN!" he suddenly felt completely energized. Hunger was a distant memory as he and the player chick fornicated over and over again.

***

Basta and Firefox sized up the camp from a distance first.

"What's that smoke surrounding it?" Basta wondered aloud.

"Fairyweed smoke. I should have known the strolling players would be portrayed as hippies." muttered Firefox "But how will we get inside? They have that bear guarding the gates most of the time."

"That's the Black Prince's bear. You know, the guy with the afro?"

"Oh. We could probably hit it with a crossbow..."

"We don't have a crossbow." Basta reminded him.

"Well, there is another option...there's a river running just next to the camp on the north side. They players have a drawbridge there that leads into the camp when it's down. The guards will be too stoned to stop us, but there's still the matter of somehow cutting the ropes holding the drawbridge up."

"Easy. I'll throw two of my knives."

"No." Firefox paced up and down the clearing, twirling a leaf in his hand. "That would require too much skill." As he reached the far end of the clearing, the leaf flew out of his hand and with a thunk was pinned to the tree by Basta's knife.

"You mean this kind of skill?" he smirked. Firefox slowly nodded.

"That could work."

***

Once they were inside the camp, they had to hold their shirts to their faces to keep from inhaling the smoke. The camp was a mess. Campfires burned free, setting tents on fire, roasting players who were too high to move. Everyone was deathly skinny, like they hadn't eaten in weeks. Which they probably hadn't.

"Where could he be? This place is a maze!" Basta exclaimed through his makeshift mask.

"We can't give up, I'm sure he'll--"

"You wanna buy my lyre, man?" It was the Piper, eyes glazed and hair unkempt, holding out a crumpled mass of wood and strings to them. "I'll--I'll give you my lyre for some food, man."

"Piper! It's us! Firefox and Basta!" Firefox shook him, but he just fainted. "Shit. Okay, lets just get him out of here." Firefox took his legs and Basta took his arms. They began to carry the Piper out when two figures blocked their path.

"Not so fast, man." It was one player and one ball of crust that could have been anything. "The Walrus is our brother in music, and we won't let you take him!"

"He's our brother in setting things on fire!" Firefox retorted. The ball of crust rammed into him suddenly at full speed, knocking the wind out of him.

"What...what was that?" Basta blinked bewilderedly. Purplegrass bowled him down, too. The players carried the Piper away, leaving them to recover.

"Whoa, man." Firefox wheezed.

"That's the spirit!" Skycloud called over his shoulder.

"You know, I have a better idea. What do players fear more than anything?" Basta asked as he picked himself up.

"Water?" he guessed.

"Fire." they both grinned wickedly.

***

"Whoa, man..." the Piper groaned as he came to. What had happened?

"Hey, you're awake, man." Skycloud was smiling beside him. They were sitting under a tree with dead leaves from the smoke.

"What happened?" he asked groggily.

"You passed out." Skycloud suddenly turned his attention to a reddish glow in his peripheral vision and the joint fell out of his mouth. The Piper knew that glow. What was it?

"HOLY SHIT, MAN!" a voice bellowed next to Piper and Skycloud turned to stare at Purplegrass.

"Whoa, man..." they said at the same time. Then Skycloud remembered the glow and ran off with Purplegrass. The Piper turned and saw that the was entire camp on fire. The two douches who hadn't bought his lyre were running towards him, helping him to his feet...they were running...and suddenly he was breathing fresh air for the first time in what seemed like years...

"Piper, are you okay?" the redhead asked.

"My name's not Piper..." he said. "I am the Walrus...."

"Fairyweed causes temporary memory loss." he explained to the other man, who was standing to one side twirling a knife. "He'll come to his senses in an hour or two."

And he did. By the time they had ridden to the fortress, he was in full command of his senses and his memories were all too clear. It was with great trepidation that he stepped into Capricorn's great hall, just in time to see a strange minstrel performing.

"What the fuck..." he muttered as he took in the pelvic thrusts, the high notes, and the young boys on leashes he had dancing with him.

"Master! We brought the Piper back!" Firefox announced triumphantly as the Thriller finished his song.

"The Piper?" Capricorn peered at him scornfully. "Has he come crawling back?"

The Piper sighed. "Yes. It was wrong of me to be snappish. You were in the right." Capricorn sat back and considered.

"I would pay you much less." he continued.

He sunk his fingernails into his palm to keep from retorting. "Yes. I understand."

"Well..."

"Just take him back!" Firefox and Basta snapped.

"But...I already have the Thriller, and he's a much less problematic minstrel..." Basta and Firefox looked at each other. Basta drew his knife and Firefox drew his sword. They calmly walked over to the Thriller and stabbed him repeatedly until the floor was covered with blood. Everyone in the hall waited in silence for them to be done.

When they were finished, Basta straightened up, breathing heavily, and exclaimed, "My god. The Thriller killed himself!"

"Yeah, he said he didn't want to live anymore!" Firefox agreed.

"Er...well...Piper, you're hired. Welcome back." said Capricorn uneasily.

"Great! I guess doing all those drugs, all that crazy intoxicated sex, and burning down the Strolling Player camp will have no consequences at all!" the Piper smiled.

"That's right!" Firefox agreed.

Fin


End file.
